I turned up at school. Or work. It’s still weird thinking that at 22 I still go to High School, but at least I get paid for it. Actually, that reminds me of how at the end of the day I was walking down the corridor and saw a 6th-form student sweeping up. I asked him if it was punishment or voluntary - apparently it’s paid! Nice.

Anyway, not long after I got there I saw the two new IT Technicians again. Both in black shoes, black trousers, and a short-sleeved black shirt with the top button undone. They were dressed bloody identical!! And apparently it wasn’t planned - but my supervisor (yep, the one who sent that dodgy txt) thinks it’s great how they’ve got their own uniform now.

I still haven’t figured out why one of them needed a spanner yesterday.

Today’s not been too bad - for half of it I’ve been allowed to browse the web and call it “research”. The ironic thing is that I was actually doing what I was supposed to and was actually doing research, but the novelty of it was great. It’s nice being employed to do what I was supposed to be doing 6 months ago - doing web development instead of technician stuff.

I think I freaked out the technician who didn’t need the spanner. I kinda got bored for 5 minutes and immediately started writing on some paper he’d left on my desk. He found it and read it. He seemed a bit in shock. I don’t think he was expecting it. I’ve still got the paper with me. It says;

Great gallopping monkey mooses Batman - it’s Ralph the squirrel out on his daily milk round delivering fresh milk to all the boys and girls that live deep in the valleys of the Teletubby Jungle!
Again Again!!!

He wanted to know what on earth was going through my mind. I gave him the short answer, knowing that the long, detailed one might worry him further.

I almost mentioned that there were voices. But it’s his first week - don’t want to scare him too much - and my supervisor was in the room - I need to be more careful really.

I’ve been doing a bit of bidding on eBay recently. Got myself a nice red light like KITT from Knight Rider on the front of my car. I know it’s only a Rover Metro, but now it’s a Rover Metro with style! (click the pic for a Quicktime Video)

I’ve also found the longest ever description for an item on eBay. By the time you’ve finished reading it, the bid will most likely have ended, and you’ll have forgotten at least half of what it is that’s being advertised. Check out “THE MOST AMAZING PC CD ROM EVER” - supposedly worth £2000.

If you read through the ad, there’s so many things on it that it will teach you. From how to gamble to “BANNED GHOST & ALEIN (sic) UFO PICTURES”. It even tells you how to enlarge your manhood without the use of pills. Now maybe I’m mistaken, but most people call that an erection! Apparently I could even find information on anyone by using information on the disc to access FBI records, US Government databases. What are the chances that the FBI and CIA and NSA have information on my 6 year old brother? Yeah, I don’t think so either.

What about this bit?

LEARN HOW TO MAGICALLY SEDUCE ANY WOMAN YOU WANT. EASY TO USE, FAST RESULTS!
***THEY WILL DO THINGS YOU ONLY DREAMED ABOUT!!!***

Personally, that scares me. Firstly, it probably has instructions such as “find your local redlight district” and “make sure you’ve got enough cash”, but secondly… my dreams are weird. May I remind you that I have dreams such as this one. There are also loads more, like the time I dreamt about the Jedi Printer. I don’t want women doing things like that. I’d prefer them to be kind and gentle, not giving penguins bus fares and such (as per the first dream). Although being charitable is quite a good quality.

Well I’m not going to be bidding on this CD. I’m not even convinced this guy has ever had an erection. Not without pills, anyway.

This entry was posted on Thursday, September 8th, 2005 at 10:16 pm and is filed under General, Tilt. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.