So there we go – Dave’s finally here – and it’s about bloody time lol! He’s great, he’s fantastic, and ladies – he’s single!

Tilt’s been through some hard deals recently. He got pretty muddy after a few trips on the motorway (bloody lorries) so I took him to a car wash. IT SUCKED! He hardly got cleaned at all, so on my way home I stopped in at a Texaco station and got my car washed there, figuring that I could trust my car to the system with the star. Pity it wasn’t that simple.

First of all, the exit was clear, but I couldn’t see an entrance. After literally 5 minutes, I found it. Before driving in, I went to the counter and ordered the wash I wanted. The person behind the till put my payment through as cash when I was paying by card, so that took a bit longer cos the manager had to clear it. Then they almost forgot to give me my ticket with the code on that you need to dial into the car wash. Phew.

I got there, put down my aerial as far as it would go, dialed in my number, drove Tilt in and waited. Nothing happened. I reversed and drove back in. Same problem. I drove in further. Still nothing. Back and forth I go and yet nothing happens. Eventually I give up and go back into the shop and tell them that it’s not working, so one of them comes out to turn it on manually once I’ve driven Tilt back inside.

Hurray! It works! I sit in there, watching the brushes going over Tilt and, I’m not ashamed to admit it – it still gets me as excited now as it did when I was a kid! The fans came on and dried Tilt all the way over and then came back for their return journey. The fans are attached to a long beam that stretches the whole way along the car and I think the beam helps with the drying process, although I’m not a car wash expert. I just like to watch. But I looked up out of my sunroof and saw something I didn’t want to see. The beam had snagged onto my aerial and I had to watch in pain as it bent further out of shape than I thought it could until suddenly SNAP! I had to sit and watch it break in two and there was nothing that I could do. Tilt had been emasculated!

I phoned my neighbour for advice, and following that advice I walked back into the station and asked them for my aerial back. I found it in the puddle on the floor of the car wash. Tilt and I then continued our journey home.

A few days later and I had thanksgiving (oh it was awesome! We’re talking food EVERYWHERE – as much as you can eat!) and we went in Tilt to rent a movie. On the way back I accidentally drove over what I would later find to be a nail. Kate’s boyfriend Iain noticed from the sound of air rushing that Tilt had a puncture and so he offered to replace the tyre with my spare. But the spare wouldn’t sodding COME OUT! After a while we gave up and I went home.

The following day I took Tilt down to Kwik Fit and my mate Craig (who acted with me in ‘It Runs in the Family’) works there and offered to repair my tyre for £10 instead of £17.50. Fantastic! Except, they couldn’t. Turns out that the nail not only goes through the tyre, but also the metal rim of the wheel itself! It’s that SODDING LARGE! Also, the reason why the spare wasn’t able to be removed is because something that screws it in had rotted through wear and tear.

When I arrived, they’d put the spare on the back wheel but told me that unfortunately, they only have a lifespan of about 5 years. It’s the original spare that came with the car. The car is 13 years old. It’s unsafe to use permanently – apparently they can overheat and so if you’re on a motorway it could actually come off! Unlucky for some, I guess. We came to a new arrangement. The spare is back in the back for emergency use only and they’ve put two more tyres on the back wheels.

The extra tyre is because the rear ones were both almost illegal anyway (tread-depth was too small).

Anyway, it snowed! It actually snowed! First of all it was a normal average day and then suddenly FLUMP! Snow everywhere! Rob (one of the Men in Black) warned me to be careful driving home because the first time he drove in snow he drove his front wheel straight into the kerb.

Ironically on my way home I did the same. I now have no hub cap on that wheel because it smashed to pieces. Oops.

But yeah, other than those few problems and him tilting the other way now, Tilt seems fine.

Oh – and my friend Louise has made a post on her blog regarding a txt message I sent her whilst under the influence of Shloer! Read it at: Pure Irony of Mind