In the comments of my last post, Justin posted the following message;

hey this is a random comment, but has anyone ever locked their keys in their car? I just did for the first time last night… Felt like a complete moron….

Personally I believe that keys are a terrible invention. For me though, I find that getting locked out isn’t the problem. For me it’s often getting myself locked in! There are times when I’ll lose my keys in my house and find that I can’t actually get out. The front door is locked, the windows are locked, there’s no-where out and I’m LATE to get to wherever I need to get to.

One good thing about my car though is that you can only lock the drivers door if the door is shut. If it’s open, you can’t lock it. Therefore, you need to either be inside with the door shut to lock it, or you need a key to lock it from the outside.

Thumb-print scanners are a good idea as an alternative to keys. Unless of course you happen to have made a deal with the mob and fail to keep your end of the bargain which in turn will lead to the immediate removal of both your thumbs buy a guy you only know as “Pie Crusher”.

For months you begin to wonder why he’s called Pie Crusher? Could it be so obvious that he likes to crush pies? Maybe it’s his favorite party trick? Maybe Pie just happens to be his first name and he’s related to that wuss Wesley Crusher from Star Trek: The Next Generation? Could that be a sensitive spot? Could you use that to your advantage?

A couple more months go by and you realise that you’ve forgotten to pay your bill to the mob. Once again, Pie Crusher and his men come round to your house to exact revenge. It is then that you learn the meaning behind his name.

He crushes you to death with a Pie.

Sometimes nicknames are just literal. Like my watch. My watch is literally somewhere in my house but it’s completely MISSING! For once it’s not my keys, but my watch!

I took it off. I had a 2 hour snooze. I wake up, and I can’t remember where I left it!.

Now I’ve had this watch for about 10 years and so far have worn it pretty much every day. The only time I take it off is when I’m having a wash or a shower or go swimming or go bungee jumping – or at least if I went bungee jumping I’d take it off…

I’ve looked literally everywhere for it! I’m beginning to worry that it might have ended up in the wash, or worst still, that I might have accidentally flushed it down the toilet. How I managed this amazing feat whilst asleep for 2 hours is beyond me, but it’s still become a major worry.

I’m currently designing a trap incase my house has been overrun by pesky Borrowers. All I need is a mouse trap, some cheese, and half a ton of plutonium.

So if anyone’s seen my watch could you let me know? Because I’d really like my watch back. Thanks.

And no, I don’t like Pies.